How to be Your Son's Hero

Yesterday, I gave my 11 year old his second lesson on using the riding lawnmower.  He was a little uncertain about reaching the brake pedal but did fine the first time so I gave him a pep talk and away he went. About 30 minutes into his mow I was standing on the back step watching him on and off when I heard, "Heeeelp - it won't stop! What do I do?". I saw he was going REALLY fast and standing up trying to steer it towards me for help. I yelled, "Hit the brake!" and he responded, "It won't work - HEEEELP!". I shouted, "Turn the key!" but he just froze and kept steering. I  had an image flash in my mind that he looked like a boy on a wild mustang stung by a bee. I ran along side him, hoping to keep from getting my foot chopped off, and grabbed the gear and popped it into neutral. He stopped and said, "You rescued me!" I suggested he take a break and come back after he calmed down and I had check out out all the functions of the mower to see if it was broken. He said, "No, I think I'm done mowing." I was worried he'd be defeated. I inspected all the gears and brake and reset the throttle that he'd cranked up near max and told him everything was working fine and pointed out that he was on setting 4 for speed when I said to keep it at 3 or less. He just looked at me with this goofy smirk like he knew -  he just knew he had done it to himself. I was really proud of him when he came back 10 minutes later to finish the job. I asked him this morning what he thought of that mower running away with him and he gave me a sheepish grin and said, "You mean my big freak out?"  I remember all too well my "freak-out" moments as a kid. It's so much more fun when you can laugh at with your own kids over theirs!

Ever have a "Book Hangover"?

Have you ever read a book that was so great that you stayed up all night flipping the pages, sweat beading up on your lip, just to get to the end? Did you wake up with a mini headache? Heartache for the characters you invested so many hours of feelings in? Did the characters swirl around in your head all day, giving you occasional twinges in your chest or shortness of breath when you thought of their plight -  distracting you from balancing your checkbook? How long did you wait to pick up another book? Was it a sequel? Or did you reach for something opposit to distract yourself? What book did this for you? What's the cure?

Yesterday started off with the typical morning bickering, followed by the discovery of hot pink ink in the cream colored carpet, followed by my head doing a 360. Middle son, Dustin, was trying to clean it by rubbing it around until it was the size of a frying pan! To make it worse, I had to punish him our first sunny-summer morning where I had nothing but bonding and bliss planned for us. As I've posted before, parenting is a real-life rollercoaster. Fast forward an hour and I'm out on the riding mower and in the corner of my eye see my five year old , Dakota, whizz by on his brothers bike with no training wheels, followed by my oldest, Josh, running beside him with his hand on his back and a huge grin. I quickly turned the mower and stopped just in time to see him whizz by - this time with three barefoot brothers running behind ready to catch him. Proud? Yes! Jealous that it wasn't me running beside? Yes!

Books in a landfill - the HORROR!

Have you ever thrown a book away?  I did - twice! Gasp!  I still feel guilty about it even though the past decade I have cherished the rest of them and collect them like trophies. I would NEVER do it again and quite the opposite, protect them and find the unwanted ones homes the day after I am done with them. I committed the crime before I had a conciousness about the life of a book. I remember buying a paperback one day, reading the first two chapters or so and being disgusted by the way women were portrayed in it - garbage can it went! I just couldn't bear to let another woman read it and knew no man would want it either. Recently, I saw that title mentioned as being a great book.  I've been taking a writing class and  have learned more about how stories often start with the opposite of what they are about to make a point. I remember donating my copy of Gone With the Wind because I couldn't swallow after reading the way the slaves were portrayed in the opening of the story. (I love the story now, but this was when I was trying to read it before seeing the movie). There was one more novel I really hated and with my mind a blur, tossed it because I was moving, overwhelmed with clutter, and didn't have the time to donate it (this was before all the awesome outlets for books came into my life).  Now, I won't even let one ripped up children's paperback get mixed in with the toys that get boxed up when they tire of them. I mend every book they've ever torn. Maybe I learned something from the guilt? How about you? Have you ever committed a crime against a book?

Someone needs to invent a logbook for moms............

I mean, my brother is a truck driver and HE get's a DOT logbook that states that after 9 hours he HAS to shut down. Albeit, he runs nonstop those entire nine, rarely eating or stopping for a bathroom break, but still the law is on his side. He just spent a mandatory 31 hr break with me to keep legal. I'm running on my weekly recurring- two days of 4 1/2 hrs sleep as usual and awaiting me is a must-do project today, a homemade chicken pot pie in the making, a must-see 3hr baseball tournament to attend tonight, and a full day work shift tomorrow, heading up the activity for the kids at church on Sunday and don't have my work schedule for that afternoon yet. I already know what's in store in the next hour when the kids come home from their last day of school - one son needs a ride to a sleepover, one is demanding requesting that I cut his hair because it's on the calendar, one has to get ready for baseball,and the other is just full of cuteness and requests for cups of milk and slices of cheese and I'm not even including the things they will think up that start with, "Mom, will you...". These are all the wonderful parts of my life that I really do love (no sarcasm there). It's just that ....."I'm out of hours, officer. What, I have to park my rig here until I gain enough hours to get down the road or I'll get a ticket, officer?  "Guess I have no choice, kids....logbooks rule!

5 year old logic....

There's no arguing with their logic- 5 year olds are always right. Just try insisting that your 5 year old put on pants when it's pouring rain outside. (Mind you, it's been 7 months since we had warm weather and it's now a balmy 40).  It played out like this....." It's raining out, you should put on some pants." He replies, "Well, these shorts(ie:swim trunks) are for water and rain is water so they are good"   Score 1 for 5 year old.

How to Be an Evil Parent.......

Step 1. Whip up a batch of your "World's Famous Chili".

Step 2. The next morning at breakfast, lunch, and dinner, scold them for farting passing gas at the table!